Ask a bunch of entrepreneurs what drives them and most will say their passion; their belief in whatever it is they are sharing with clients. Three-year DB resident Jacques Derreumaux is no exception. “If you want to maximise your chances, and enjoy most of your working days, you’d better find a product that moves you,” the owner of online gourmet food shop Cheese Club opens. “My main success is in food; there is no coincidence. I have always been a gourmand!” Jacques earned his entrepreneurial chops in mainland China where he spent 16 years opening businesses both for himself and for investors. His lightbulb moment came in 2017 when he moved to Hong Kong and, along with a university friend Normann Gany, launched a business dedicated to delivering premium fruit and vegetables to high-end restaurants. After a few months, the duo added a fruit deliver y service for households. “When set ting up a business, the first thing you need to consider is what pain point your idea is going to solve. In our case, we noticed that artisan cheese was extremely expensive in Hong Kong, meaning cheese lovers had to limit their intake. From that observation, we decided to look for a cost-effective model.” Cheese Club launched in January 2019 and was an immediate success. “Thanks to our group pre-order offers, we could buy directly from European artisanal producers, save on logistics, avoid waste and ultimately propose prices 40-50% cheaper than the usual Hong Kong prices,” Jacques explains. “Successful entrepreneurs are adaptable. You star t with an idea, but you need to be open to adjust when it reaches the market. Your environment evolves constantly, external events like protests and Covid hit you – it’s important to stay flexible and be able to reinvent yourself.” The duo opened Cheese Club Singapore in 2021, and kept widening the scope of products offered, to finally become a complete grocer y store. “Today we sell more meat than cheese, maybe time for a rebranding,” Jacques says with a grin “Everything is a matter of timing. A good idea at the wrong time is worth nothing, move on! That ’s the best piece of entrepreneurial advice I’ve ever been given. That and keep a close eye on the competition. We order from our competitors regularly to make sure we are still on top in terms of quality, price and service. With the business doing well, how does Jacques ensure it stays that way? “You need to focus on your team,” he says. “You can’t possibly do everything by yourself, so you need to make sure you are surrounded by the right people. When hiring staff, I look for people who can multi-task, who are committed, and who are respectful to colleagues, suppliers and clients.” Lastly, when asked how he reaches his target audience, Jacques says he spends little on advertising. “Almost all our client acquisition is done through word of mouth: you invite some friends for dinner; they like the food and ask where you got it from. We are lucky to work in a field that’s about sharing pleasure.” Cheese Club Contact: +852 2178 2229 Website: cheeseclub.hk Cheese Club delivers to Discovery Bay every day – place your order before 3pm for next-day delivery

The autumn months mean barbeques and outdoor dining, if you’re lucky in the comfort of your own home. Here’s how it’s done Aaah. Autumn. Time to bask (if you can call it that) in the authenticity of sub-tropical urban humidity – cold drink in hand. Sticky as the Hong Kong climate can be, the right accoutrements and attitude can maximise that leisure time. When was the last time you heard of anyone turning down a barbeque invitation – rain or shine, 20 degrees or 40? That’s right. You haven’t. But first things first. There are plenty of ways to barbecue – with gas, with charcoal, with wood chips, with split logs – so which do you choose? Here in DB, where smoking out the neighbours is frowned upon, charcoal and gas are your only real options. So, let’s take that as our starting point. Purists will tell you to avoid gas grills, that the smoke is an ingredient in itself, and without it, you’re missing out on the nuanced flavour. Gas devotees, on the other hand, point to the way heat-distributing materials in gas barbecues work to vaporise drippings and create an aromatic smoke. What’s important is whether you can taste the difference. Do you prefer the strangely delicious over-done beef that only charcoal can provide, or are you good with gas? One thing’s for sure, it ’s easier and quicker to barbecue with gas. A gas barbecue requires no real warm-up time – the griddle gets nice and hot in just five minutes. With charcoal, you need to wait around 40 minutes for the initial flames to die down before you have the whitened cinders essential for your first hamburger. Generally speaking too, you can fire up gas barbecues with ease, and gas gives you more control – adjusting temperatures is as easy as turning a knob, so you are less likely to overcook things. On the other hand, if you are looking at barbecuing as a pastime – if you really want to make a meal of it – then gas is simply no fun. What you’re after is a fiery, challenging experience that can’t be compared to cooking at a stove; you’re satisfying a basic human need to make fire, and you enjoy the hands-on experience of working with charcoal. With that decision made, there are a few golden rules to follow. First, purchase brand-name items that come with strong product warranties, good customer support and are easily assembled. Second, choose a grill with at least 400 square inches of cooking space. There’s nothing worse than staggering too many items for larger gatherings, or making people wait during intimate dinners. Lastly, don’t get suckered by bells and whistles: select features that are essential, like stay-cool dials and adequate storage. Preparation surfaces are nice, but if space is limited, simply do your chopping in the kitchen. Retailers from Wing On to Japan Home Centre carry scores of grills at reasonable prices, but for serious cooks and those redesigning an outdoor space, Everything Under The Sun and Bru Living both car ry some amazing barbeques in varying sizes – gas or charcoal, fitted and /or portable. Your first port of call could well be Cadac: the range encompasses charcoal and gas grills in various sizes to fit all outdoor spaces. Cadac grills are sturdy, easy on the budget and reasonably compact – from the modest Leisure Chef to the four-burner Meridian. Other brands regularly appearing on the best grills of 2025 lists are CosmoGrill, VonHaus, Weber and House of Home. On the space-saving side, look no further than Grand Hall’s T-Grill, designed for acclaimed Australian chef Neil Perry. The T-Grill is modern, sleek and best of all, compact, with a smooth curved hood and hidden gas-tank compar tment. The barbeque works on Crossray infrared sidemounted burners, which reduces the smoking and flare-ups that char your food and make the neighbours crazy. Infrared provides an even, consistent heat while using up to 50 percent less fuel than traditional open flame burner systems – if you’re energy conscious, this could be the grill for you. Eco warriors will also want to note that solar-powered barbecues are now readily available. Take the Helios Grill, by designer Sean McGreevy, which uses a reflective parabolic dish to focus sunlight onto a solar receptor, transforming it into usable energy. The energy travels from the dish to the grilling platform and heats a coil in order to cook food. After dark, or under polluted skies, a retractable plug, stored in the base, provides an alternative energy source. Compact and fully portable, you can grill whatever you choose, wherever you choose, while reducing your carbon footprint. At the other end of the spectrum, when major remodelling is on the cards, are the Viteo (Austria) and Tao (Italy) outdoor kitchens, which is where designers will tell you the formerly humble barbeque is heading. Decked out in Corian, stainless steel and fine woods, these are the cream of the grilling crop, and an excellent way to bring the resort lifestyle home. Got the hardware, got the (organic) food and you’ve clearly got at least a bit of alfresco space. The last problem is your lack of desire and time to pull a Mar tha Stewar t and deck out the terrace in order to set the perfect mood. First and foremost: keep it simple, and remember that IKEA can be your best friend for colourful matching napkins and shatterproof tableware. What you want to prioritise is creating a fully functional space in which to eat, drink and have a good time with family and friends. Don’t overcrowd it. That’s the biggest thing: overpowering might just be a balcony decor’s cardinal sin. At the end of the day, you won’t use it and it won’t be inviting. Go smaller rather than bigger and you’ll actually enjoy the space more. All that being said there’s nothing to stop you getting creative with the essentials. Everything from pest-control devices to fans and heaters are now being designed to make the outdoors a prettier and more practical place in which to entertain. Certainly, the latest outdoor lamps look like they belong indoors, but waterproof and washable, they are specifically designed for year-round outdoor use. Rechargeable lights in various shapes and colours are also popular, as are ‘no flame’ candles for the table top. A crucial element to throwing an outdoor shindig is seating. For last-minute af fairs (which can happen with a barbeque), much depends on how much traffic your outdoor space sees. If plans are for the same day, simply move some of the indoor furniture outside to create an entertainment area. But most owners of a ter race are at least partially prepared. If you have outdoor furniture in place then all you need are a few accessories to dress up the space – sofa pillows, side tables for drinks and so on. Likewise, plates and utensils that we would normally keep for indoor use are now making it outdoors. You can, for instance, add a dash of contemporary restaurant luxe by serving your appetisers on wood or marble serving platters. Pop a platter in the fridge beforehand and it will help keep your deli meats and cheeses cool. With all this under control, ambiance is the last hurdle. Potted plants instantly add life to a space but if you don’t have a green thumb, simply splash out on flowers. And finally, get some candles and put them on everything. Just don’t forget the iPod dock and a strong fan.

Production for the new Harry Potter TV series began in the UK this July with the aim to go deeper into the books and capture a new generation of fans. What is it about the hepatology that makes it so bankable, asks Ray Robertson Potterheads who grew up with Harry Potter (or enjoyed a second childhood with Harry) by reading J.K. Rowling’s seven-book franchise are counting the days until the new Harry Potter TV series starts to air. Production began in July and the series is planned to roll out on HBO over a 10-year period (2027 to 2037) with one season dedicated to each book. That’s a whole lot of Potter coming soon! While HBO and Warner Bros. are aiming to capitalise on the franchise’s financial potential, there are other factors at play. The TV format will provide a more book-accurate adaptation and allow for an in-depth portrayal of all the plot points, characters and magical details that didn’t make it into the movies. The series aims to capture a new generation of fans with a fresh cast including Dominic McLaughlin as Harry, Arabella Stanton as Hermione and Alastair Stout as Ron. So what is it about the Potter books that makes Warner Bros. so sure they will appeal to a new generation, and Potterheads so excited by the prospect of a lengthy TV adaptation? J.K. Rowling’s ability to take us into a fantasy world where magic is a natural part of everyday life is certainly a key factor. But the greatest books provide more than just a ‘good read,’ they impart goodness and wisdom; they support and carry us through life. The Harry Potter hepatology, like Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings trilogy, does just that. A MORAL EDUCATION It becomes easier to take on a bully at school once you have fought Lord Voldemort, Severus Snape, Bellatrix Lestrange and Dolores Umbridge alongside Dumbledore’s Army. Children learn that it’s wrong to be prejudiced or to seek power over others. Intelligence, loyalty and nerve are important; our choices determine who we are Anyone who labels J.K. Rowling a transphobe should note that the hepatology also has a fiercely inclusionary message to impart. In the world of Potter, children are taught always to support and be accepting of those who are ‘different’. They learn to empathise with outsiders and to stand up for anyone who is mistreated simply for being themselves – Harry, Luna Lovegood, Remus Lupin and, of course, Dobby, the House-Elf. In Potter, only people like the Malfoys use the word Mudblood. Muggle-born Hermione is the smartest witch of her age, and all the central female characters are warriors – they are not the sort to sit by while others save the day. What’s more, the Potter books are profoundly spiritual, focusing on the importance of the soul, the consequences of choices and the concept of life after death. The after-life is a particular focus in the last book where we see Harry using the Resurrection Stone to summon the spirits of his parents, Sirius Black and Remus. After being hit with the killing curse, Harry meets Dumbledore (who died in the previous book) at a clean, empty version of King’s Cross Station. At this symbolic crossroads between this world and the next, Harry is given the choice to go on or return to his body. A THRILLING RIDE A profound, classic example of beautifully written fiction, the hepatology shows kids what literature – or more specifically, fantasy – is all about. First and foremost, it’s a thrilling adventure story, filled with unexpected plot twists, edge-of-your-seat suspense, and magical surprises. A true page-turner, it keeps readers captivated from start to finish. Immersed in a mind-blowingly complex fantasy world, children connect powerfully to the characters, they live vicariously through their potentially fatal challenges and, when the last page is turned, they return to their real lives having saved the wizarding world from Voldemort and his Death Eaters. There’s a lot of fun to be had, fear to get through and bravery to be found before the ‘happily ever after’. Importantly, J.K. Rowling doesn’t talk down to children or pull any punches. There’s not much sugar coating in Potter. When Sirius dies, Harry’s pain is almost too much to take. Children discover, the hard way, that people (even Dumbledore and Sirius) aren’t all good or all bad but a mixture of both. Many of the characters kids care about most die at the Battle of Hogwarts – Nymphadora Tonks and Remus, Colin Creevey and even Fred Weasley. The hepatology may end well but it’s still a tragedy of epic proportions. J.K. Rowling writes as if she were recounting both history and legend, and draws children into a world that feels every bit as real as their own. Kids reading the books for the first time, literally grow up with Harry. They walk with him on the road to maturity, sharing his setbacks and breakthroughs, choosing between hallows or horcruxes. PURE ESCAPISM The other side of it is that Potter gives kids the chance to experience a really potent fantasy and almost live it, without any of the consequences. They get to visit a place where impossible things are suddenly, temporarily, possible. And they get to have all these experiences in the safety of their own homes. Like all the best children’s fantasy books, Potter is written in such a way as to help kids differentiate between what is real and what is not. The hepatology opens in the real world, one with which young readers are familiar, that is populated by characters not unlike themselves. Then, after a page or two, something happens that announces the transition into a world of make-believe. ‘Magic’ is introduced gradually, first with subtle hints like a vanishing glass at the zoo, then with the conspicuous appearance of Rubeus Hagrid, who arrives, on a flying motorcycle, to deliver Harry’s acceptance letter to Hogwarts. Children know when the bridge between reality and fantasy has been crossed, and they adjust their fear threshold accordingly. With these parameters in place, kids are free to sit back, suspend disbelief and really have some fun. They can get so caught up in the story that they scream when Aragog attacks Harry, Ron and Fang in the Forbidden Forest, or when Nagini emerges from the corpse of Bathilda Bagshot in Godric’s Hollow. What they are enjoying is the thrill, the hyperarousal of the fight-or-flight response within safe parameters. It’s true that certain scenes in Potter can cause nightmares (none of us has ever really gotten over our fear of Dementors) but, generally speaking, the fears children experience in a story like this are manageable. By age seven, most kids know the difference between what is real and what is not and, once they are able to do this, most can cope with the scares they experience in the make-believe world of a book. Kids can handle the fears they face in the wizarding world because the wizarding world doesn’t actually exist. Or does it? A FORBIDDEN FOREST EXPERIENCE Wands at the ready! Harry Potter: A Forbidden Forest Experience is launching its inaugural China tour in Shenzhen’s Longhua District in the first week of October. Running through March 2026, the globally acclaimed outdoor adventure unfolds on an illuminated forest trail, and features magical creatures and wizarding wonders inspired by J.K. Rowling’s Harry Potter stories. Tickets are on sale now at Klook.

HARVEY LAW GROUP REVEALS THE RISE OF CITIZENSHIP-BY-ANCESTRY PROGRAMS AND HOW EASY IT CAN BE TO CLAIM CITIZENSHIP THROUGH LINEAGE As interest in dual citizenship surges, more people are exploring foreign citizenship options than ever before. Citizenship-by-Ancestry (CBA), which allows applicants to claim citizenship through their lineage, has emerged as a popular choice for those seeking a second passport. One of the key advantages of CBA is that it simplifies the pathway to citizenship without the need for job offers, relocation, or hef ty investment funds. Unlike other immigration routes that can be complex and costly, CBA allows individuals to obtain citizenship based on their family heritage, making it a more accessible and straightforward option for those looking to pursue a second passport while staying rooted in their home countries. “If you think you don’t have any ancestors with foreign nationality, take a closer look at your family tree. You might just find an ancestry link that opens the door to a second nationality and passport, which can really enhance your lifestyle and career opportunities,” advises DB resident Jean-François Harvey, Global Managing Partner of Harvey Law Group, the leading international business and immigration firm headquartered in Hong Kong. CBA hotspot: the European Union Did you know that over 50 countries worldwide offer some form of CBA? Popular destinations for claiming CBA include Canada, France, Italy, Slovakia, Spain and Portugal. While most countries require you to have at least one citizen parent to qualify – think France and South Korea – others allow you to claim citizenship through a grandparent, like Greece, Spain and Ireland. Some nations, like Slovakia, even extend this opportunity to great-grandparents. Recently, there’s been a remarkable surge in interest in CBA programs across the European Union. This is because, with an EU passport, one gains not just a powerful travel document but also the right to live, work and study anywhere within the EU. Plus, EU citizens can access consular protection and social benefits across member states, making this pathway to citizenship increasingly attractive for non-EU nationals. France’s CBA program is particularly appealing, as it allows children of French citizens to apply for French citizenship regardless of their birthplace, language proficiency, or familiarity with French culture. Similarly, Portugal’s citizenship law offers a citizenship pathway for grandchildren and children of Portuguese citizens, regardless of their birthplace. Relaxation of CBA rules With the world becoming more accepting of dual nationality, some countries with historically rigid rules are now relaxing their requirements. For instance, Austria, which typically does not recognise dual citizenship, has recently allowed descendants of Nazi persecution victims to claim citizenship wi thout renouncing thei r foreign nat ional i t y. Slovakia has also made significant strides in making citizenship more accessible to its diaspora. The country has streamlined the application process for Slovak descendants, allowing many to reclaim their citizenship through relaxed requirements. Remarkably, qualified descendants can still apply for Slovak citizenship, even if their ancestors lost or renounced their Czechoslovak citizenship. In a similar vein, the United States is now accepting DNA tests as valid proof of a connection to a qualifying ancestor. This development is a game-changer for those who may lack sufficient documentation to support their claims, opening new avenues for citizenship that were previously out of reach. The Global Ancestry Index If you’re interested in claiming CBA and have roots in multiple countries, consider using the Global Ancestr y Index (globalancestryindex.org) to explore your options. With a comprehensive evaluation of 197 CBA options worldwide, this index empowers you to compare and contrast various programs and discover which nations offer the most favourable conditions and streamlined application processes for obtaining citizenship. If you have any questions about CBA, we encourage you to reach out to us at harveylawcorporation.com/citizenship-by-ancestry . The experienced team at Harvey Law Group is here to provide the guidance and support you need to move forward with confidence.

There are few people, if any, more qualified than Thomas Corbin to talk about why Discovery Bay loves Team Fear. After all, the race was first held for him and his friends, writes Mervyn Black One of the highlights of the year for kids from DB and beyond, the Team Fear Junior Challenge has been running since 2001, when an eight-year-old Thomas Corbin convinced his dad Steve to create an adventure race. “Back then, my dad was part of a semi-professional adventure racing team and used to travel around Hong Kong and Asia,” opens Thomas. “I always really wanted him to take me with him. I used to say I could keep up – I didn’t know what I was talking about – but I wasn’t allowed to go. So I asked him if he could make an adventure race for me and my friends. “My dad talked to his team, which at the time was called Team Fear – the Far East Adventure Racers – and they set up the first race in 2001. Forty kids took part, and it’s taken off from there.” While Steve no longer lives in Hong Kong and isn’t as actively involved in organising Team Fear these days, Thomas is very much at the coal face as one of a group of 17 committee members that bring the event together annually. Held each November, Team Fear has become an institution in DB and is something of a rite of passage for many youngsters. It challenges kids aged eight to 17 with running, coasteering, hiking, gorging and kayaking; there’s also a water jump and an obstacle course. Registration is open for this year’s race, scheduled for November 30, at www.team-fear.com. Team Fear is open to teams of two across seven age groups – under 9s, under 10s, under 11s, under 12s, under 13s, under 16s and under 18s. Each team – all girls, all boys or mixed – must start, run and finish the race together. “This mutually supportive dynamic forges great bonding opportunities for the racers,” chimes in Chris Mackreth, chair of the Team Fear Race Organising Committee. “In fact, we often see the same teams come back year after year to compete or defend their titles. Every racer gets a finisher medal but there are special medals and a mention for category champions and first runner-up teams.” There are two course lengths: 8km for the youngest and 12km for the older racers. The courses are not set and they change every year. “We’re still in the process of planning the 2025 route, and racers can always look forward to a different route than they experienced in previous years,” Thomas says. “Looking to the future, we are considering bringing back some elements that were in place pre-Covid, like the biking and abseiling, or adding new elements that haven't been seen before.” “The actual course is kept completely confidential each year,” says Chris. “We purposely don’t release the route till just before the event. This means it is always fresh and ensures that racers who live in DB, versus the rest of Hong Kong, don’t get an advantage.” “There’s another really good reason, we keep the route under lock and key until the day before the race,” says Thomas. “In the past, when we divulged the route earlier, a lot of parents tried it out and injured themselves!” On race day, children’s safety is, of course, the number one priority. “In our long history we can report a very safe event with no more than cuts, bruises and sprains,” Chris reassures. “Children can expect a well-marked course with ribbons and dedicated marshals throughout to ensure safety. “We rely on the support of over 250 volunteer marshals who help us all around the course. The marshals manage their section of the route and are well-versed on the particular challenges and any potential hazards. We use sufficient marshals so that we can operate an ‘always nearby’ system to quickly identify any issues. “It is in fact mandatory for each competing team to have a nominated marshal, aged at least 16 years, available to help on race day,” Chris adds Additionally, a sweep system is in place so no one can get left behind on the course, and a team of first responders, many of whom are nurses or doctors, volunteer their skills on race day Roughly 600 brave racers will tackle Team Fear this year, significantly less than the pre-Covid highs of close to 1,000. “It’s building back to what it was, and that’s a good thing,” says Thomas. “Right now, we’re growing the committee with several new members, and we’ve limited participant numbers so that we can scale back up safety. “I think one of the reasons Team Fear is so popular is that people in DB are normally quite active. Families do a lot of hiking and sports in general and either the kids are interested in taking part or their parents want them to experience it,” Thomas adds. “I’ve done the race many times and I’ve done it with friends who didn’t want to do it, and they’ve done it and they’ve loved it.” So what are Thomas’ top tips for racers enrolled to compete this year? “I would say there are two things you need to do in terms of preparation. Number one is to make sure you are comfortable moving over rocky terrain. That’s where you can save a lot of time and overtake people. If you practice coasteering, with supervision of course, and build some experience doing it, you’ll be able to fly through that section. It can be quite difficult if you haven’t done a lot of training. “Number two is to work on endurance. There’s a cutoff time of four hours, and if you’re fit enough to run most of the course, or at least the flat and downhills, you’ll finish that much faster.” Thomas is quick to remind, however, that winning is not the be-all and end-all. “It’s not easy, no matter what age you are. Some kids walk most of the way and others train for months and months, but there is always a sense of achievement. It’s not about being the person who gets there first: you feel that overwhelming sense of achievement to have made it to the end wherever you finish.” Another satisfying element of participating in Team Fear is raising money for charity, with sponsorship funds directed to Youth Outreach, a local charity that supports disadvantaged youth in Hong Kong. “Team Fear has been able to donate over HK$1,000,000 to Youth Outreach since it first started,” Thomas concludes. “The racers get a real kick out of that.” 2025 race date: November 30 Enrol at www.team-fear.com

Blunt, big-hearted and endlessly busy, Preeti Sharma’s life is marked by grit, reinvention and dogs – lots of dogs. Elizabeth Kerr reports Do not ask Preeti Sharma what she thinks of anything because you’re likely to get her unvarnished opinion. There’s a colourful, slightly profane way to describe how much energy the Discovery Bay multi-hyphenate has for nonsense, so unless you can take the brutal truth, don’t ask for her thoughts. Which is not to say that if you do get into a rambling conversation with the 51-year-old Delhi native you’ll get anything less than a welcoming and at times shockingly naked exchange about, in no particular order: choices, self-determination, dogs and food. Preeti’s an easy woman to ramble with too, particularly given her straightforwardness and tendency to phrases like, “Oh, all that gunk on samosa chaat is the best part!” Only a woman who’s truly lived would see the beauty of gunk. On this afternoon Preeti is sitting at a Starbucks in IFC, dressed for work in casual striped pants and sneakers. She’s drinking coffee, entirely unconcerned with the impact of caffeine; she can’t recall the last time she had an early night anyway. But she looks far from fatigued. Work right now consists of caring for her 15 dogs, three of whom are fosters; put ting the finishing touches to her welfare trust that donates to Philippine feeding programmes, and Hong Kong and Indian elder care NGOs and pet rescues; running DB’s My Pet Shop in the Nor th Plaza (find it on Facebook: mypetshopdb); teaching Indian cooking and catering through Preats Kitchen (find it on Instagram: preats.kitchen) and, somehow, teaching IB-level mathematics privately – around the world. She has an online class this evening with a student in the UK. “That’s my life. Last year, I think I fostered about 39 or 40 dogs, all of them adopted out,” Preeti states proudly. “I’ve applied for Section 88 as we’re changing the shop into a welfare trust, and 10% from our earnings will go to that. I want to pay the bills but I also want to make sure that this pet shop does more for animal and human welfare.” She pauses for a split second. “I’m also blessed with my four helpers. They all love dogs.” Preeti’s road from essentially Delhi street kid to Hong Kong professional philanthropist started when she first came to Hong Kong for a job in 1993. She was 18 and rolled the dice thinking she could do better for herself, and started working as a waiter before getting a chance to go behind the scenes in the city’s kitchens. A natural cook, she took advantage of the opportunity and years later, 2024 to be exact, opened her own kitchen. “I’ve started taking limited orders for Indian food. All the proceeds go towards my dogs.” Things took a turn when she got married quite young and had her son. The son was great; the rest of it not so much. “Three days in I knew my marriage was never going to work, but because I was rooted to my culture, I thought I’d try and make it work,” Preeti states matter-of-factly before launching into the kind of private details most people try and keep buried. The couple argued over a second child, and things got so bad Preeti contemplated taking her life. Now she recalls the moment that pulled her back from the brink. “The kids hugged me tightly one day and though I’d stepped off the track I thought, ’I can’t take their lives from them.’ They trusted me. I used to be a people pleaser but that day, for the first time I said, ‘I don’t give a…’ I’m not the same person as I was before.” She sunk eight years into a fight for a divorce and custody of her children; the kids took her maiden name and no one has ever looked back. The Sharmas have a nickname for the man who is no longer part of their lives, but Preeti gives credit where it’s due. “He did give me my kids. And how many people get to have a relationship with their own self? How many actually know themselves? I spent a lot of time reinventing myself; I had to go back to the trestle to see what was missing in my childhood. My kids were not going to miss anything.” Part of Preeti reestablishing a so-called normal life for the family involved relocating to DB and taking a teaching position, just in time for the children to start demanding pets. Though she grew up with four dogs and a cat in Delhi, Preeti was under the impression pets cost a fortune in Hong Kong. Discovering they didn’t, she decided to indulge her kids and adopt a puppy: Shadow, who has become the “alpha and the king of the house, and speaks Hindi”. Then came the two-million-dollar Indigo. Another rescue in 2020, Indigo turned out to have a mysterious health issue that became so persistent Preeti wound up spending the equivalent of a down payment on a flat for her care. Her vet advised stopping, and most people simply thought she was crazy to spend that much money on an animal (tell that to pet owners). She had her kids’ support on her decisions, and DB dog lovers came through when she was down to her last pennies. After animal adoption advocate Catherine Lumsden (of Catherine’s Puppies) posted the story on socials, Preeti had thousands of dollars in donations. “Indigo’s the love of my life. Those [vet] bills remind me how she brought me close to animals and their lives and feelings. I think it was a lesson I learnt about compassion. I call her my Buddha,” Preeti says. “I’ve struggled all my life. I grew up poor and begging on the streets. You can always get more money.” Whenever the chance arises to repay some of the kindness, Preeti takes it, calling it the best kind of karma. Now, three decades on, she’s an unapologetic single mother of a 26-year-old son on the way to a career as a pilot, and a 24-year-old daughter heading into a Master of Education programme. She’s a small business owner, after purchasing My Pet Shop from its previous proprietor, who thought she was the logical choice to take over as a longtime customer. She’s an active philanthropist and a major pillar of the DB community 12 years in, with an email signature that says: ‘Preeti, Garv, Sonal… Shadow, Bailey, Indigo, Whiskey, Zac, Ivy, Chloe, Mocha, Simba, Nala, Biscuit & Preet.’ Only three of those listed are bipedal. Preeti works to live, and to give back to those in need, not because it’s a tax write-off; just because it’s right. On top of that her openness about her life is another service, a way to destigmatise many of the challenges she’s faced. Preeti’s not Superwoman: she has her lonely moments and probably works too much, but she has no regrets. Plus she has her dogs, and someone new is always coming through her kitchen door. “In everything there’s a yin yang. You need both. You’re lucky if you never see the downsides of life,” she finishes. “Come to my kitchen and we’ll cook together. We’ll make samosa chaat with all the gunk.” Deal.

To become brave, children need to experience fear and learn to tolerate it. Reading scary stories together can help them with that. Ray Robertson reports Halloween is a strange sort of festival, one that cuts with a double-edged sword. Despite all the treats, sinister tricks lurk in the shadows. Children revel in the dressing up and love eating all the candy, but the supernatural element of things that go bump in the night is never far from their minds. And yet, or perhaps because of this, children love All Hallows' Eve. As parents, we have a responsibility to know the limits of what our children can handle. We don’t want to force them to hear a scary story, if they’re not ready for it. On the other hand, we can’t protect them from their own developing emotions, emotions that are best explored and managed in the safety of their homes and with the attention of their parents. It’s important that children learn to handle feeing afraid, and one of the best places for them to do that is in the pages of a book. ONCE UPON A TIME The first scary books most kids read, or have read to them are fairy tales. Our children are weaned on versions of the Brothers Grimm’s medieval morality tales, in which beasts and innocents face off in dark forests or forbidding castles. The consequences of these clashes aren’t always pretty, and there’s a lot of fear to get through before the ‘happily ever after’. Classic fairy stories from Sleeping Beauty to Snow White are big on dark supernatural forces – wicked witches cast cruel spells that mess with fair maiden. These stories have some really tough life lessons to impart (that have nothing to do with magic), and this is one of the reasons we continue to read them to our kids. But we also continue to read them to our kids simply because kids love them. Of course, kids love all the good magic that’s expressed in fairy stories – fairy godmothers turn rags into ballgowns, animals talk and everything ends happily. So, is it that which makes them love fairy stories, that prevents them from simply being scared witless by them? In par t. But it’s important to know that children learn to make the distinction between fantasy and reality very early on. By age seven, most kids know the difference between what is real and what is not and, once they are able to do this, most can cope with the scares they experience in the make-believe world of a book. It’s true that scary stories can cause nightmares (none of us has ever really come to terms with the horror of Bambi’s mother’s death) but generally speaking, the fears children experience in made-up stories are manageable. Kids can handle the fears they face in Neverland because Neverland doesn’t actually exist. Kids are instinctively drawn to scary things because they rely on the continuing safety of the real world. And in the real world, ghosts and witches and evil fairies don’t exist. Reading scary stories means visiting places where impossible things are suddenly, temporarily, possible. In this way, scary stories play an important role in children’s emotional education, allowing them to identify and control their fears. They give them the chance to experience a really potent fantasy and almost live it, without any of the consequences. They get to experience fear in a controlled environment (in the fantastical world of the book) in the safety of their own homes. The best children’s books are written in such a way as to help kids differentiate between what is real and what is not. A common device sees a book open in the real world, one with which young readers are familiar, that is populated by characters not unlike themselves. Then, after a page or two, something happens to these characters, which means they transition into a world of make-believe. The Pevensies walk through a wardrobe and find themselves in Narnia, Max goes to sleep before sailing through night and day to meet the Wild Things. Children know when the bridge between reality and fantasy has been crossed, and they adjust their fear threshold accordingly. HAPPILY EVER AFTER The other side of it is that kids, like adults, actually like to suspend disbelief every now and then, and really feel the fear. It’s fun for them to get so caught up in a scary book that they scream when the flying monkeys swoop down on Dorothy, or when James attacks Bella in the dance studio. What they are enjoying is the thrill, the hyperarousal of the fightor- flight response within safe parameters. Essentially then, kids are turned on by fear and their ability, through reading, to confront it and cast it aside. They find a way to control how scared they want to be. Scary stories help turn children into readers; the adrenaline rush of seeking out danger and then stepping away is what makes them return for more. It’s exciting for them to discover that they can get through the fear, and that they can put the book down whenever they choose. Children benefit from all this because they learn to grapple with the range of emotions – anxiety, sorrow, confusion, surprise, anger – that fear invites. They come away from a scary story with new tools for managing or controlling their reactions to fear. Call it a new confidence or self-awareness, but it becomes part of how they deal with trauma going forward. Essentially, what children learn is courage. It becomes easier to stand up to a bully at school once you have fought ghosts, monsters or zombies within the pages of a book. There are multiple reasons why book series like Harry Potter and Twilight captivate young readers. Children connect to the vulnerability of the characters, they live vicariously through their potentially fatal challenges and, when the last page is turned, they return to their real lives having survived Voldemort or the Volturi. Vampires are scary. Dementors are too. Kids love to be scared, but not too scared. A parent’s job is to understand this, to invite discussion and make a variety of stories available. And to leave the night light on.

Are you getting caught up in the frenzy of Xmas? It’s time to take a breath and transform the way your family celebrates. Ray Robertson reports Christmas may have become a commercial carnival but that doesn’t mean you can’t buck the capitalist trend and ‘do’ the holidays a little differently. So instead of trucking in the presents and bulk-buying new decorations, look around you for opportunities to reach out to others and show some genuine goodwill. The instant gratification of treating family and friends to their ‘best Christmas ever’ is one thing but helping other people can also give you a warm glow. While you’re at it, refuse to buy into the societal pressure of having to have a ‘perfect’ Christmas. Relax and enjoy the time together, and remind children that Christmas is about giving, not gifts. DARE TO BE DIFFERENT What rubbish, you may be thinking. Now more than ever, after 18 months of pandemic and when lockdown ruined last year’s holiday, we need to celebrate with friends and family. We deserve to treat ourselves to an iPhone 14, WildTable4, Liberty cotton pyjama set and Xbox Series S Holiday Console; we will buy our kids everything on their wish list, including the VTech Level Up Gaming Chair and Jurassic World Inflatable T-Rex. And nothing will stop us gorging on turkey, ham, stollen, Christmas pudding, zabaglione, and every other decadent treat that comes our way. Most of us are perfectly happy having a self-indulgent Christmas, thank you very much. But here’s an experiment. Think of everything you don’t want from Christmas. Sprouts, secret Santas, Dickensian schmaltz, Amazon Prime, the look in your children’s eyes when they tell you on Christmas morning that they’ve already got one of those. What exactly would you and yours miss out on by cultivating a new Christmas experience? If you’re ready to take a new approach, challenging the social norms that say we must ‘keep up with the Joneses’ is a good place to start. Begin by asking yourself questions like, ‘What do the children have?’ ‘What do they need?’ and ‘What is our financial situation like?’ Once you have those answers, it’s easier to decide on – and stick to – a budget for gifts. Another trick when it comes to Christmas shopping for children comes in the form of an easy mantra: “Something they want, something they need, something to wear, something to read.” This leaves plenty of scope for practical gifting with a few treats that will be genuinely well-received. Give simple stockings filled with small gifts including things like a piece of fruit… try something different! Consider too that by keeping spending low, you can leave wriggle room in the budget for a big-ticket family holiday every now and then. Christmas gives us a chance to step off the hedonistic treadmill but instead, we have made it the annual culmination of buying, giving, receiving, being disappointed and queuing to return things. When you give your children an avalanche of Christmas presents, you risk turning them into consumer junkies; people who measure their self-worth by the value of their possessions. Tough words but true. As parents of impressionable children, we need to look at our own habits and language. Light-hearted talk of ‘retail therapy’ may inadvertently reinforce the idea that the best way to lift your mood is buying something new. Where most adults can recognise that this quick-fix approach doesn’t address serious problems, children and teens may not have the ability to reason this out. The motive for consumer addiction is often about seeking to fill a hole that a person feels inside themselves. Spending may temporarily offer relief, but in the long run, the hole is still there. Therefore, as parents, it is important to try to foster a lifestyle that builds a core sense of self-worth. Maxing out your credit card on Black Friday and revelling in your feel good overspending doesn’t set much of an example. GIVE OF YOURSELF Christmas could provide us with an opportunity to put aside our own needs and wants, and do something like the Centre for Effective Altruism recommends, namely thinking hard about how best to help other people. This is something we could aim to do every day but most of us need a spur, a special reason to get benevolent, charitable, curious. Christmas could be just such a catalyst. Start small. Make a gift. It will mean so much more than something store bought. From handmade chocolates or cookies to picture frames, a knitted scarf or bulbs in a flowerpot, there are millions of easy-to-make options. Or you could decide that gifts just aren’t necessary any more. Why not ask your friends if you can make a donation to their chosen charity instead? Or, offer your skills in place of a present, and make the gift a useful and experiential one – think babysitting, tutoring or cooking. Alternatively spend part of the holiday volunteering for those less fortunate. You can also encourage your kids to gift their time. Impact HK ( www.impacthk.org ) began with the idea of one act of kindness per month for the underprivileged in Hong Kong, and has since grown to a full programme of monthly initiatives, events and fundraisers. Older kids and teens may benefit from joining one of the group’s monthly Kindness Walks, where donations of clothing, toiletries and food are distributed in various locations around the city. Feeding Hong Kong’s ( www.feedinghk.org ) weekly Bread Run involves willing volunteers of any age in collecting surplus bread from bakeries to send to schools, shelters and charities. The organisation also invites groups to host Food Drive initiatives, collecting non-perishable items such as rice, cooking oil, and canned and dried goods to redistribute to a variety of good causes. SPREAD GOODWILL So, let’s say my argument is winning you over and you’ve decided to do things a little differently this year. What more can you do in the lead-up to the big day? Firstly, practice random acts of kindness. When you’re in town and see an acquaintance getting stressed out by the Christmas chaos, do something kind for them. Help carry their shopping bags on to the ferry, or buy them a cup of coffee. If we want to see more Christmas spirit, we need to be proactive in showing it to others. The win-win here? By brightening someone else’s day, you brighten your own. Secondly, show gratitude to those who help you daily. Think of the people who deliver your mail, pick up your trash, drive your kids to school on the bus, teach or coach them, or assist you in the supermarket, pharmacy, or bank. Christmas is super hectic for them as well, with many of them working long and extra hours. Why not show your appreciation with a homemade treat and gift card? Lastly, set aside one hour each week to slow down and reflect on the spirit of the season. Make yourself a cup of hot chocolate and listen to Christmas music or watch a Christmas movie. Take a brisk walk on Tai Pak Wan, and stop to look at the lights and decorations in DB Plaza. Read a Christmas book with your children. Don’t miss the little joys of the holidays because you are moving too fast.

Being fit and fabulous is one thing but, in pursuing health and happiness, we need to be sure we are sending the right messages to our kids. Trisha Hughes reports Exercise is a word that fills me with an undeniable kind of dread. It means potentially putting on Lycra and exposing my body to the world, which is something I have no wish to do, especially so soon after my Christmas binge. But if you look around the plaza, the fit women of DB have no qualms about doing exactly that. I watch them in a kind of awe as they get off the buses, water bottles in one hand and phones in the other with not the least bit of trepidation. As they walk confidently through the plaza on their way to the gym, their other half is strapping on his helmet and heading off to the bike trails. As I watch, I often wonder what it is that makes the gym (or yoga studio) so enticing to these fit and fabulous DBers. Is it the thought of a quarter pounder combo without the consequences at the end of the session that makes it so appealing? Or is it the alluring promise of those endorphins ready to rage mysteriously through their bodies at the end of a punishing one-hour workout? I was raised in a country where women are obsessed with their bodies. Australia is one of those countries where nearly everyone knows how to swim and they spend every available weekend soaking up the sun on a beach in their skimpy bikinis. And of course, women watch other women and they make judgments, and for a while people’s opinions were a vital part of my life. But oh boy, was I wrong. I’ve come to realise that generally speaking, people’s judgements don’t matter after all. It’s freed me up for a ‘who cares!’ adventurous approach to life. You will know by now that I am no exercise bunny. And although we are roughly the same age, I am certainly no Madonna. She’s been working out for 40+ years, she’s been married twice, and has six children and a gruelling career. Goodness, the woman should be exhausted! She should be lying on the couch at night watching movies and eating ice cream with her fingers. Instead, she’s off to the gym at least twice a day and out there par tying night after night, all with the unbridled enthusiasm of an 18-year-old schoolgirl. I can only admire her stamina and energy. By contrast, I picture myself slumped over a treadmill, sweaty and dispirited after only a few minutes in the gym. A fretful voice in my head whispers: ‘There has to be some other way!’ CELEBRITY DIETS AND THE GYM That was the lightbulb moment. I decided to delete exercise from my 2023 agenda… all I needed was a diet. The thought made me stop and open up my new calorie-counting phone app and ask it how many calories there are in one glass of red wine. I knew I’d get a quick and simple answer like I did with the boiled egg question. The app then asked me was it red wine or jus? Regular? Cooking? Sparkling? Or just red wine? After a lengthy think, I pressed regular. It then asked Sip? Large glass? Extra-large glass? Or Other? Playing it safe, I opted for other. By then, I thought I’d just twitter Madonna because she would certainly know what course of action to take when it came to calorie counting and exercise. Or even Joanna Lumley, actress, champagne swiller, owner of the world’s most seductive voice and as thin now as she was in Absolutely Fabulous. And then, I stopped to think… do we place too much emphasis on the current celebrity preoccupation with telling us what to eat? The thought made me pause and wonder if we put too much faith in celebrity diets and by extension in the all-pervasive ‘name and shame’ culture, popularised by shows like The Biggest Loser. I’m no doctor or psychologist but finger wagging rarely works. NUTRITION IS THE SOLUTION Are these messages perhaps the wrong ones for our children? When 12-year-old kids are undergoing gastric banding surgery, and the obesity rate is still climbing, surely we should be thinking whether these anorexic-looking people are the ones who should be influencing us. Our obesity crisis will not be solved by a clutch of privileged people who eat small amounts of food and crave nothing, because for most of us food is perennially fascinating, not least delicious. If in doubt, you only have to watch a Jamie Oliver show to know that extensive dieting is bad for us, not to mention the long-term damage it does to our skin. It’s nutrition that is the solution to the problem. But with so many people offering different ideas on nutrition, who is right and who is wrong? There’s no doubt about it, diets are confusing. We have low fat, low-carb, low-calorie, detox, low-glycaemic and high-glycaemic. Some people insist on the low calorie option, while others insist that eating less more often will build up metabolism and is the way to go. Then you have all the weird celebrity diets, with a cacophony of stars eager to disclose their intimate culinary habits. Victoria Beckham has eaten steamed fish and vegetables almost exclusively for 25 years; Rebel Wilson uses the Mayr Method to lose weight, cutting out sugar, dairy and gluten and chewing each bite of food 40 times; Joe Rogan is a fan of the carnivore diet (just meat and fruit) and when Mariah Carey wants to lose weight, she eats nothing but Norwegian salmon and capers. (Incidentally, it’s inadvisable to try these diets at home.) EVERYTHING IN MODERATION So here is what I’ve I figured out. Life can be tragically short and yet, it’s in our hands to fill it with heaps of happiness. I know that to be miserable about self image is easy and that self-absorption is an utter waste of time. I’ve learnt that no matter how rich or poor you are, how many shoes you have (that number is called ‘never enough’), and how much exercise you do in the messy business of life, the greatest possessions and achievements you can ever have, are your friends and family who love you just as you are, with or without a muffin top. Of course, it’s good to keep an eye on your weight but what about those magic words ‘everything in moderation?’ And now the dreaming part (and dreamers out there will know what I’m talking about), I would really like it if the day would come when I can eat all the chocolate I want and not have it show up on my hips. While I dream, I am lacing my feet into joggers ready to hike around beautiful Lantau. If anyone should see me collapsed in a bush, please be kind enough to haul me out and revive me. Low-cal red is fine.

Said to be man’s best friend, dogs can provide kids with a host of benefits as well, even in very early childhood. REPORTING BY Raphael Blet Have you noticed that almost every young family has a dog? Sometimes the baby comes first, sometimes it’s the pup. Either way, dog ownership is the way many of us measure our family’s ‘completeness’. This phenomenon is particularly noticeable in DB (Dogs and Babies, right?), where every family seems to have at least one of each. The question is why. Why does the picture of an ‘ideal family’ contain a dog? For sure, photos of our children playing with their brand-new pedigree pup or endearing rescue mutt can up our following on Instagram but there’s so much more to it than that. Research shows that dog ownership can positively contribute to our children’s health, both mental and physical. Let’s take a look. TEACHING RESPONSIBILITY Having a dog is a huge responsibility and, traditionally, that’s one of the main reasons we bring them into our kids’ lives. With a pet in the house, children learn what it means to take care of a dependant animal, one who relies on the family for pretty much everything from food and exercise to love and cuddles. Getting children involved in a dog’s care prepares them for responsibilities later in life, and by the same token it builds their self-esteem. Once children realise that their dog’s survival and happiness is dependent on their actions, they will feel good about themselves and their achievement. There are numerous ways to involve kids in the care of a dog and the tasks you assign should be ageappropriate, such as allowing a three-year-old, who is too young to walk a dog, to put the water bowl down instead. Older kids can of course take more responsibility, even sole responsibility for a dog. It’s important to ask yourself how much responsibility your child can handle. How much assistance will he need from you? BUILDING RELATIONSHIPS In bringing a dog into our children’s lives, many of us want to repeat the past… We look back to our own childhood when we were inseparable from our four-legged companion, and we want our children to have the same experience. A dog can be the perfect playmate, a source of comfort, a trusted friend and a supplier of unconditional love. The bond that develops between kids and their dogs can be very strong, so much so that children often name their pet when asked who they would go to with a problem. Dogs can make children feel unconditionally accepted, whereas friends, siblings and sometimes even parents can judge and criticise. Research shows that dog ownership also makes children happier and less stressed. Petting a dog has been proven to lower cor tisol levels in both the person and the pet. Playing with a dog ups serotonin and dopamine levels, meaning we feel good. In choosing a four-legged playmate for your child, it can be dif ficult to decide which breed is the best fit. Golden Retrievers, Beagles and Irish Setters are all sound choices – known to be playful and protective. Pugs, Brussels Grif fons and French Bulldogs love their families – particularly their laps. Breeds associated with aggressive behaviour – German Shepherds, Pit Bull Terriers, Doberman Pinschers – are seldom seen on ‘best family dog’ lists but there are always exceptions. Remember that while breed plays a part, each dog has its own unique personality. ENCOURAGING EMPATHY Multiple studies show that children who own dogs are more empathetic, better able to understand and share the feelings of others, than those who don’t. As children bond with their dog, they learn to read its behaviour and understand its needs – they learn to know when it’s hungry and needs food, when it’s happy and wants to play, when it’s sad or stressed and needs affection. It makes sense that this ability to empathise transfers to human interactions. Research shows that owning a pet can significantly lower the chances of children showing violent and/ or bullying behaviours. By the same token, their enhanced ability to empathise may lead them to stand up to bullies if they see their friends being badly treated. We want our children to be kind, considerate and compassionate. Just as importantly, they need to learn to set boundaries for themselves and respect those of others. And here again dog ownership can help. Think about what happens when a child pulls a dog’s tail, or stomps on its feet. Despite not speaking our language, dogs are expressive enough to make us understand when we’ve crossed the line. Discussing a dog’s reaction can open the way for a wider conversation with our children about their own personal boundaries and those of their friends. PROMOTING PHYSICAL HEALTH One of the most obvious benefits of dog ownership is that it keeps kids active. But it may surprise you to know just how active they are compared to children who don’t own dogs. According to a Child Heart and Health Study (CHASE), a St George’s project examining the health of 5,000 UK-based primary school students, children with dogs spend an average of 325 minutes (more than five hours) doing physical activity per day, 11 more minutes than those without dogs. Dog owners also spend 11 fewer minutes (562 minutes over the seven-day stint) in sedentary behaviour each day, and they were found to take 360 more steps than the other kids. Surprisingly enough, homes with dogs are also healthier for kids. Research has shown that babies in homes with dogs have fewer colds, fewer ear infections, and need fewer antibiotics in their first year of life than those raised in pet-free homes. Children who grow up with a dog have fewer respiratory tract infections and get asthma much less often than other kids. It’s not clear why living with a dog makes such a difference. A time-honoured theory, the hygiene hypothesis, suggests that children’s immune systems mature best when infants are exposed to germs in just the right amount. Too many germs are unhealthy but so is a sterile, germ-free home. That theory is now giving way to the microbiome hypothesis. It’s no longer about getting exposed to the right number of microbes, but to good bacteria and viruses that alter the microbes in children’s intestines and protect against both allergies and infections. Of course, this isn’t a one-size-fits-all kind of thing. It would be a mistake to bring a dog into the house of a 12-year-old with asthma – exposure has to happen very early in life. And what of kids who are allergic to dogs? Are any dog breeds hypoallergenic? The shor t answer is no but there are less-allergenic breeds – dogs with a low-shedding coat – around whom allergy-sufferers can sometimes be comfortable. Call your local animal shelter, they might just happen to have an almost hairless Chinese Crested who’s waiting patiently to complete your family.

Encouraging children to help around the house sets them up for adulthood, while allowing them to feel competent and responsible in the here and now. Kate Farr reports. While many of us are fortunate enough to have a helper to relieve us of daily household chores, outsourcing all of the domestic drudgery can have some unexpected disadvantages. For kids who are accustomed to always having ‘Auntie’ around, the university years, and the subsequent forays into independent adulthood can come as a pretty rude awakening. Ultimately, it falls to us parents to ensure that our kids turn out to be productive people, rather than pampered princes and princesses. The good news is that you can start teaching life skills to even the tiniest of tots, simply by having them near you as you and/ or your helper go about your daily chores. Older kids, meanwhile, are capable of doing practically any household task that you can do, as long as they are given plenty of guidance. The first step is to make sure children know exactly what they’re being asked to do. Start by showing them how to do a specific chore, like loading and unloading the dishwasher, and then monitor their progress until you are certain they can do it unattended. Make your expectations clear and demonstrate how you'd like even the simplest tasks to be done. Second step, establish a regular schedule. Start by giving children a few simple tasks to complete, then add to the list once these chores have become part of their daily routine. As always, be mindful about the need for balance: children need the opportunity to acquire valuable life skills by helping out at home but they also need plenty of time to do their homework and have some fun. TAKING CHARGE By the time your children reach their teens, they should have a regular roster of household tasks to tackle without supervision. Examples include vacuuming, stripping the sheets from the family’s beds, and even cleaning the bathrooms. This helps to build trust, and sets a benchmark for cleanliness for your soon-to-be-independent young people. In addition to helping out around the house, a chores list for teens should provide them with the oppor tunity to take responsibility for themselves and their things. Encouraging teenagers to be tidy (particularly in their bedrooms) can be challenging, but here’s a smart hack – introduce them to the wonderful world of Stacey Solomon, the empathic organising consultant, who hosts popular British TV show Sort Your Life Out. Solomon and her team have some genuinely helpful and relatable de-cluttering/ tidying tips that can benefit everyone, including the messiest teen on the block. Solomon’s basic mantra? Sort your possessions by category, keep only the items that you absolutely love or need, and donate, sell, recycle or toss the rest. Adopting Solomon’s method results in tidier living spaces, no doubt, but there’s more to it than that. The realisation that items they no longer want – clothes, gadgets, furniture – can be given (or sold) to someone else can be a big one for teens, inspiring regular clear-outs and an altruistic mindset. Teens like to be in charge, so it’s a good idea to reflect this in their chores list by asking them to take care of other family members. Tasks like babysitting younger siblings and making their school lunches, watering household plants, and feeding and caring for the family pet, empower teens. They realise you feel they are responsible enough to have someone (or something) depend on them. Whether your teen is a dab hand in the kitchen or completely disinterested in the culinary arts, a cooking course that covers all the basics can be a wise move, equipping them with the tools they’ll need to feed themselves in the outside world. Designate one night per week for your older teen to take charge of feeding the family, meaning that they get to hone their skills while you reap the benefits. Speaking of rewards, pocket money can be a major motivator for teenagers, especially if they are saving up for something really special. While bribing children with cash to get them to do their chores is not recommended, a small cash reward can be a little extra incentive for them to go above and beyond at home. Make it clear that hard work will always be rewarded – at home in the here and now, and also in the future, in the form of bigger pay checks. CHORES FOR TWEENS Tweens become increasingly independent and, from around nine or 10 years, they can tackle many core household jobs, such as cleaning surfaces, washing up, emptying bins and sorting the recyclables. This serves to reinforce the message that a clean home takes some effort, and that ‘the rubbish fairy’ doesn’t actually spirit their discarded wrappers away. It will also stand them in good stead for maintaining shared student accommodation in the years to come. When it comes to kitchen duties, you can start by involving tweens in the process of packing their own lunch. Make an event of this by choosing a new lunchbox together (bento boxes or stackable tiffins allow for lots of different flavours). Then make a ‘menu card’ of options that includes plenty of fresh fruit and veggies, a protein, a carbohydrate and something sweet. Kids can ‘place their order’ for the week ahead by ticking individual items from each category. Then, they can help you shop for ingredients at the supermarket. If time allows, a regular themed food day is another good way to get kids interested in the kitchen. Ask them to pick a country from a map, then spend some time researching facts about the culture, the people and, of course, the food. The grand finale is to shop for ingredients together and cook a meal from the chosen country to eat as a family. CONSTRUCTIVE GAMES Toddlers and really young children are like sponges soaking up the influences around them, and at this age, the strongest influence of all comes from their parents. Model the type of behaviour that you would like them to learn and encourage them to help with simple household tasks as early as possible. Sweeping and vacuuming are endlessly fascinating to young children and a soft duster is a safe tool for little hands. Laundry time is another great opportunity to turn a chore into fun. Toddlers love to load washing into the machine (be vigilant for stray Duplo and toy cars) and pass pegs... and sock-pairing becomes a great game when they’re learning to match up colours. Most little ones adore tidy-up games, so ensure that your toy storage is accessible, bust out a tidying song, and encourage them to be in charge of putting away their own playthings. This helps to reinforce the importance of looking after treasured items and soon becomes second nature. Your next point of focus is the kitchen – and the daily chores therein. If you have the space, you can encourage kids to stand on a low stool and get handson with the food prep. Scooping, spreading, whisking and even some carefully supervised chopping allows children to understand how their meals end up on the table, and can be instrumental in broadening a fussy eater’s culinary horizons. By continually reinforcing the message that household chores are everyone’s responsibility, you are giving your offspring valuable life skills that they can draw on throughout their lives. And the earlier you start, the less resistance you’re likely to encounter along the way. So grab your toddler and a dustpan, and get to work.

Ahead of May 14, Sharon Lesley Le Roux reflects on the reasons we celebrate Mother’s Day, and why they are as relevant today as ever. As a child growing up in the UK, Mother’s Day was all about a handful of daffodils (my mother’s favourite flower) picked from the garden, a handmade card containing a message of love, and a Mother’s Day breakfast that consisted of my mother’s favourite marmalade, with toast and coffee, all delivered on a tray to my mother in bed. For my mother, I’m certain it wasn’t about any of these gifts at all. It was knowing the pleasure that bringing them all together had given me, her child. It was understanding the excitement I felt about being able to ‘surprise’ her on her special day. And, because she was my mother, she would have overlooked the soil I’d brought in on my shoes, not seen where I’d coloured outside the lines, not cared one jot about the burnt bits I hadn’t managed to scrape off. THANKING YOUR MOTHER Whoever, and wherever, we are in the world, we all observe Mother’s Day. The same day my mother and I were busy celebrating, so were mothers and their children in Ireland, Nigeria and Bangladesh. Mother’s Day is one of only a handful of celebrations observed by families all around the world; each nation setting aside a date once a year – the second Sunday of May in Hong Kong – to celebrate the relationship of mother and child. In the 21st century, what is Mother’s Day about? Is it just another of those ‘Hallmark’ occasions which businesses cash in on? I don’t think so. Handmade cards made by small hands still beat shop-bought ones, just as they did when I was a child. Phone conversations with mothers and grandmothers abroad are priceless compared to flowers, chocolates or gif ts ordered online. Mother’s Day isn’t just one special day in the year when children get to show their awareness of, and appreciation for, the things their mothers do for them; of course this happens in households all over the world every day. For children, Mother’s Day acts as a reminder to stop and think what their relationships with their mothers mean. This year (being an English mother, my family and I celebrated on March 19), I asked my two girls what Mother’s Day means to them. My 13-year-old believes Mother’s Day is “a way for women to feel good about themselves, especially those who’ve gone through the hard work of having kids and raising them. And, it’s for the children to appreciate what their mothers have done, and gone through, to make their lives as good as it can get for them.” My five-year-old feels Mother’s Day is about “giving lots of love to your mum, and giving her a big love heart for loving us”. APPRECIATING YOUR CHILD For mothers, Mother’s Day is a time when we are reminded to pause a while in our busy lives, and reflect on just how absolutely awesome it is for us to be able to bring life into the world. It’s for us to remember there was a time when our little people didn’t exist, and to acknowledge how much richer, as a result, our lives are for having them. It’s a time for us to look back and see how, as each year goes by, we are changed by the act of motherhood. We are changed by the sacrifices we make daily, simply to put our children before ourselves. And we are changed by feelings of protection and empathy and joy and more, the depths of which we didn’t experience before we had children. In creating our children we, in turn, have evolved and grown. We appreciate the blessing and the privilege that comes with the role of motherhood. We send messages of love to our own mothers, understanding only now the sacrifices they made for us when we were children. And, we send our friends who are mothers Happy Mother’s Day messages, acknowledging our shared membership of one of the most rewarding clubs in the world. HONOURING UNCONDITIONAL LOVE Not so long ago, my mother sent me a Helen Exley collection of quotes and poems: In Praise and Celebration of Daughters. On one of the pages of the book I found this: ‘I even love her bones. We are so close. She is my very best friend.’ Mother’s Day isn’t just the time to celebrate the mother figures we are to our children, but also the friends we are to them – and they to us. Mother’s Day is the per fect time to leave our separate interests aside, and do something together we enjoy. My children have two mother figures here in Hong Kong – myself and Mama Ruth, our family’s domestic helper who my kids have known, and loved, all their lives. The day before Mother’s Day this year, my girls, Mama Ruth and I re-watched Beauty and the Beast. We enjoyed the movie – one of our favourites – and each other, as we laughed and cried together. There’s a Filipino saying that translates as: ‘Even with the food all ready for her to eat, the mother will always find the need to give every last morsel to her children.’ This is true of all mothers, but here in Hong Kong especially, mothers like Ruth are a perfect example of just how far mothers will go for their children. A few years before she joined our family, Ruth had come from the Philippines to Hong Kong, leaving her two-year-old son in the care of her brother. She came because working here meant she would be able to put her son through school, and put food on his table. Ruth is in no way unique. In Hong Kong thousands of women have given up that precious relationship with their children we western mothers take for granted, so they can give them a better life. Ruth’s boy will soon be 23, and will be graduating from nursing college. His mother is justifiably proud of him, as we are of her, knowing those sacrifices she has made to get him to where he is today. Be it as children or as mothers, the meaning and traditions we each attach to Mother’s Day are rooted in love and honour and respect. Though it may well have become a commercialised event in recent years, still it remains a celebration – of motherhood and of the relationship between mother and child. Mother’s Day is the recognition of the protection, nurture, sacrifice and unconditional love that mothers give their children, and the happiness and love their children give in return. For those of you who are celebrating this year on May 14, I wish you a Happy Mother’s Day – and a Happy Helper Appreciation Month to boot.